We were driving by a sign the other day on our way to the mechanics shop to pick up our car. The sign was on a little white country churche's board out front. It said "Patience is waiting without worrying!" Grrr! Isn't it funny and quite amazing how God puts what we need to hear the most or learn the most right in our paths. He has the most perfect way of reminding us about the things that are important. Ironic too that we were headed to the mechanic to get my car, and it wasn't fixed so we ended up waiting 1 1/2 hours at the mechanics while they took a "few" minutes to repair it correctly! Strange how that works...
In our baby journey so many times I have worried. We worry as we wait for the doctor to call, we were anxious as we went into surgery, and as we awaited the results. We wait, right now, to see how my body responded to Clomid and whether our efforts this month will produce the desired outcome. Through it all, I'd like to be able to say that we've had patience... but if patience truly is "waiting without worrying"... I'm pretty sure we don't have the patience thing down.
Why do we worry? Well, that's pretty simple. I worry because I know that we serve a pretty awesome and powerful God, who is capable of blessing us with a child, but who also knows what's best for us. I worry that what He knows is best for us, might not be what we want. We worry because it's hard giving up control, even to someone who is so much more capable of controlling our lives than we are. Finally, we worry because our heart's are heavy and our arms are empty.
Lord, please allow us in the weeks and months ahead to give you complete control. Teach us to wait without worrying. To put our trust fully in you knowing that you are more than capable to sustain us through this journey. You are amazing and we love what we can see you doing even now. We love you and we will wait for your perfect plan and perfect timing!
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